Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Yesterday, I asked Colleen to leave me the car so I can attempt a solo errand and get out of the house. So, I went to the grocery store for the first time in months, all geeked-up with a mask and wipes. I ran into 2 women- moms of my girls's classmates. One of the women asked me "Are you sick?" and I respond "Yes, I have Cancer".

Asked & answered. Felt a bit raw, the exchange. I suppose I need to get used to answering questions or explaining why I can or can't do something etc. Part of the process. Besides my family and circle of friends/caregivers and my peers at Loyola Cancer Center- there's no need to ask me why I look like Shit, ?Nes Pas?

I must say, that I didn't feel bad or sad when I told Tracey my illness, or Kristen, who I saw at the Spirito Concert on Sunday. I was thrilled to see my Colleen's concert, to do the Mom thing I always used to do - BE THERE for my child and RELISH in her accomplishements. I was OUT, I was dressed in a cute outfit, and I felt so good to be doing what I was doing at the moment.

I picked up Colleen after school and proceeded to get somewhat lost on the way home! Chemo Brain, so they say!

Lee is out of town until Wed- I miss his presence. If he reads this blog, he probably is saying "Yeah, right Peg". He's been home since this whole cancer-thing started. Working from home, taking care of me, the house and the girls. It's not like we sit and gab all day long - but we are in each other's presence most of the day, so I know he's HERE, if I need him. That is slowly changing though...I am getting stronger, I don't need a babysitter to stay with my 24/7. So my emerging independence gives Lee his as well.

I need to go to my Primary Doc today - I have a nasty sore throat- enlarged tonsil and I want to take care of it so I can go to Chemo tomorrow. Cross your fingers this is an easy fix and not a stupid-ass "complication".

Please lift a Prayer for Nancy Jennings - a dear friend of my Parents. She's struggled with lung issues for a long time..she needs some of God's heaing. thanks


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